hollow

I've always loved Halloweens. For the past years, I've spent it with my treasured family and friends.

Back in grade school, I enjoyed dressing up and walking around the village in my Trick or Treat costumes. I've tried trick-or-treating as a hippie, as a witch, and as a gypsy. All those times, I've enjoyed putting on my homemade costume and applied my own make-up to complete whatever look I've decided on. And then in recent years, I spent the Halloween sleeping over my girlfriends' house or attending Jillieta's gigs. Halloweens meant FUN, FUN, FUN! It was one of my favorite seasons besides Christmas.

But today, I no longer had any costume on. I think I outgrew all of them. I didn't even have any makeup because I left my entire kit in Franco's car over the weekend. I only had my trusty sunscreen (SPF 38) to protect my skin. And if anybody asked me what I was for Halloween, I'd say I was a "DRIVER".

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE DRIVING (especially fast driving without all the traffic). But I guess my day started horribly because I was in a rush from the very start and I couldn't do anything about my chapped lips. (All my lip balms were in my other kit.) I couldn't even find my hairbrush and decided to use my fingers to comb my hair. (It actually worked).

While in heavy traffic, I received a message from my best friend in Canada, Cami. Her beloved lola (grandmother) just passed away. Cami's lola used to feed me whenever I came over their place while they were still in the Philippines. My own lola even met her lola and from then on whenever I mentioned Cami to my lola, she would ask me about her lola. After reading that text message, I knew this was a different Halloween.

And it was. For me, it was.

I spent my Halloween night in my cousin's house for her bridal shower. It wasn't the traditional bridal shower with dancers and stuff. Friends, cousins, and their husbands and boyfriends were present. It was fun actually since I spent Halloween with my family and relatives.

And it could have been a completely *happy* one, I think. Possibly.

I tell myself it's not yet over. By tomorrow, I'll know how I truly feel. (Later, rather.)
Because right now, to be honest, I am just floating. And I don't know whether to be sad, sentimental, or something else. It's weird.

It's a weird halloween.
I'm just being honest.

Nonetheless, I hope your Halloweens have been Happy