I'mmmmm.... I'm Blogging Away

A pinch and a punch on the first day of the month. One of my seatmates back in gradeschool used to chant that while actually pinching and punching me. It was the perfect excuse to pinch and punch someone. In that case, the perfect excuse to pinch and punch me. Whatever reason she had, I did not and still do not know.

Anyway, I pinched and punched her back.

I could have just laughed it off but I did not. It was a light pinch and punch so I gave her a light pinch and punch as well. I guess it's because I rarely back down on anything. Be it a completely childish pinching and punching session or an important point that I have to send across, I keep my stand if I know I am right. Sometimes even if it's a totally unimportant point, I still keep my stand. Maybe that's also why I end up having a banter with some people... nuninuuuuu. You know who you are. ;)

But when I do make mistakes or when I realize in retrospect that I actually made mistakes, I apologize. I try to be fair most of the time. I am very nice and warm to most people. But I've learned to fight back when there's something terribly wrong. Or even fight back playfully when needed. ;)

NEW MONTH, NEW RULE
On this first day of June, I am changing the rules in my blog. Whether my blue jars below have something in them or not, I'm writing down something whenever I think of something to write. And just for today, I will not edit. I will NOT EDIT. Again, I will not edit. I just want to tyyyyype awaaaaaaay. Let loose before this Jungle June swallows me again.

I restrain myself from writing everyday in my blog because I think the internet is filled with nonsense as it is. But sometimes we find sense in nonsense. Or sometimes we have to go through nonsense until we find perfect sense. So really, is anything completely nonsense then? Maybe not. I think this will eventually make sense. And maybe some of the nonsense I consider in the internet is sensible to some. Nothing is completely nonsensical then. Well, except maybe killings and stuff.

Here I am, writing for writing's sake. I LOVE IT and please do let me. I grew up writing my thoughts, my feelings, and all my observations almost everyday. And now that I started with blogging, I've written less and less. I find that sad. People can read and judge you right away with what you write. Maybe that's why I write less. BUT that's about to change.

As one of my favorite people in the world told me, if you truly want to do something, make time for it. And that's what I'm doing now. I'm writing for myself today. Period.

My everyday writings in the past were the silliest actually. My high school journals contained all my analyses about boys and beauty. Remember how I grew up dark and receiving a comment from my ex-crush that I was "pretty but too dark". For an adolescent, that was way harsh. My summers were spent in Summer Enrichment Program classes in Ateneo and every time I would come home, I'd write about my crushes that day. I came from an all-girls Catholic school so I was just "boy crazy" in this quiet and funny way in high school. If I knew then all the things I know now, I would have not attended SEP and just enjoyed my summer breaks in far-away places!

I grew up reading beauty magazines. My Physics teacher even commented that I read too many magazines because one of my projects really did look like it came out from a magazine. Imagine, I made a short magazine-like quiz in relation to Physics ;-P

My Grade 3 diary is a grammar teacher's nightmare and my funniest journal ever. If I were to correct all the grammar and spelling errors there, it would be one bloody notebook.

In the house, we mostly speak in Tagalog and occasionally in English. But as a kid, I would write in complete English. Whether I had the right grammar or not, atleast the thoughts and ideas were there. It could be based on my reality. I had an entry on the day my lola had appendicitis and had to be brought to the hospital. It could be based on fantasy and dreams. I had an entry about a nightmare I had back when I was seven. Even then, I always dreamt. Every night, I dreamt. Each morning, I remembered.

I guess this is why remember so many things, even the most trivial, especially the most trivial. I write them down. And since I've written them, I make these things somewhat immortalized. Of course, these things will always be based on my interpretations. But who else will interpret them but me?

Memories are all re-constructed.
If noone re-constructs them, they will be gone forever.

This is the main purpose of my blog. I'm re-constructing my memories. I'm writing my story. From the present to the past and back. And I'm sharing them with you.

And you, yes you, you are always part of it. You and I, we make the stories.